Saturday, October 24, 2009

the spotless mind:::

{via wide open spaces}

if you've never had the good fortune of viewing the film 'eternal sunshine of the spotless mind', you have no idea the power and enormity of the words in this photo.

in the movie, joel & clementine are two eccentric, lost souls-- who find themselves in a relationship with each other. the pure bliss of early romance quickly starts turning to disdain-- and the two individually decide to undergo a procedure that will, one-by-one, erase every trace of memory they have of one another. the catch is that they view each memory before it is taken from them. in essence, reliving each day they spent together. when forced to consider all the beautiful, wonderful, glorious aspects of their relationship, they realize how much they truly love each other, but it's too late. "the spotless mind" is irreversible.

the exchange, quoted on the chalkboard in the photo, takes place at a time during the film when both characters are reliving a memory---each aware that it will soon be over and forgotten. in their dream-like state of remembrance, they make the conscious effort to do what they didn't have the sense to do in real-life. that is to enjoy every precious second they have together.

i ponder this concept. i always have. i have never wanted to be a prisoner of regret. i can recall being a small, small child. perhaps 7 or 8. and crawling out of bed in the middle of the night, sneaking into my parents room, and apologizing for telling a lie, or being mean to my sister, or having a poor attitude. i was petrified that they would die in their sleep, and i never would have made things right. to this day, i don't hang up the phone without saying i love you. i never leave coffee with a friend without a hug. i do my best not to hold grudges. and i strive to stay in contact with as many friends as i can. you never know what a day will bring. and it's a dark place on the hindsight of understanding and realization.

i never want to escape emotion. i love feelings. even sadness at times. when i feel, i know i am alive. i would never want to live with a spotless mind. what an unfortunate existence.

i live with no regrets. i love incessantly. and i embrace every aspect of life::: the good. the bad. and the ugly.

because compared to the alternative of having none of it--

i feel pretty blessed to have it all.


  1. you live your life with such light--& that's truly amazing!

  2. i saw diane birch open for mat kearney in philly! i liked her music a lot!
    and yes, life would not be complete without the sadness and pain along with the happiness.

  3. That is such an amazing dialogue. One must remember it at all times.

  4. i am glad i was able to read this.

    amazingly well written.

    beyond that though , the honesty and genuine light shining from you here is almost more than words.

    this touched me pretty deeply and left a huge resonance of hope.

    thank you for writing this.

  5. what wonderful thoughts! this has been a wonderful pick me up in the middle of a dreary day....